Greetings and apologies for the long space between posts.
This has been an interesting, and challenging six months.
As anyone who has lost a loved one, particularly a spouse, will know – it takes a lot of adjusting to living with part of you missing.
Then my daughter was moving house. Except for Sabbaths, I went every day for two weeks to help pack, transport (in my tiny Matiz) and help with the cleaning.
When I ended up seriously ill, and hospitalised, she was very upset, thinking she had killed me.
It was my choice. I volunteered to help.
I still have pneumonia, but at least I am home. Bit by bit I am picking up things that are left ‘hanging’.
God is good, and call me mad if you like, but I believe He allowed me to ‘see’ the answers to some lingering questions that haunted me about Geoff’s last illness. I am thinking of putting it in as an ‘Epilogue’ to Geoff’s Last Journeyings, which I will get back to when I can sit and concentrate for longer.
I was taken to hospital. I think they X-Rayed me in bed, then it started… the discussions over me. “Significant consolidation in the …. (lung), and a few other terms that I recognised. I remember thinking, “That’s what they said about Geoff.”
I was quite content to die and wait, like he is, for my resurrection. Still, I remembered that God has the big picture, and simply said, ‘Your will be done.”
I could not believe it at first. I was taken to the ‘old’ birthing suite. Geoff had been there too. Part of the ward was used as overflow beds when he was having surgery there. Now it was a ‘medical’ ward.
Over the next few days, the treatment was eerily similar. Not allowed out of bed alone at first. Then the indignity of having to use a Zimmer frame LOL. (At least the hospital Geoff was in had modified ‘walkers’.) Walks with oxygen to see how far I could go. So many times I thought, “This is what Geoff went through”. It was oddly comforting. When I spiked another 40.9 temp and they had to call in the RMO, I was given a Salbutamol neb. They explained why they were doing it, and so on, not realising that I had a great deal of experience with those things. Geoff was on several a day.
I found it is possible to lie quietly, resting in God, and be aware of what is going on around me.
Then a Gallium scan was booked… more similarities.
But that is not the point, what I meant was that as I lay there, helpless, with nurses and doctors, physio and OT it was as if I was having a glimpse of what Geoff went through. Oddly it was very comforting, answered a great many ‘I wonder…’ questions, and gave me peace.
God is good, and His mercy endures forever.